I received a question from a dear boy, Kodiak. This is what he asked:
Hawoo Mr Koda MD
I would like yur advice. It is fury important and I hope woo can helps me.
I haf a girl I like but Maw won't let me have some private time wif her.
Any idea how I can either change my Maw's mind or sneak some private time wif her?
Also my brudder likes her fury much too and has had some private time wif her, does this mean I should not like her?
Play bows and woofs
Kodiak my dear boy, it seems like you've got yourself in a pickle!! I hope I can try to help you cos you are one of my bestest friends and I don't want you to be getting into spots of bother! I think the best idea is to go with the WOOF Theory of Attraction and if this girly wurl likes you then your bound to notice results immediately!!
Here it is:
W for Woo
Woo woo woo as much as possible. The girls love to be wooed and if you can pick some of your mums flowers and woo with them too, extremely good!
O is for Offer
Make sure the girl feels welcome, offer her to share YOUR toys, YOUR mum, YOUR space on the bed and anything else that means anything to you. She will be extremely delighted and impressed!
O is for Obligated
If the girl of your dreams that you mentioned even likes you a smidgeon then they'll be obligated to give you some affection or attention in return for the wooing and offering that you completed in the previous steps.
F is for Field
If the previous steps have for some reason been ignored and not reciprocated it is best to move to step "F" as fast as possible. You have to play the field. Pay attention to ALL THE OTHER GIRLS. Ignore the apple of your eye, Ignore your dreamboat, Ignore your Smoochywoo, whatever pet name you refer to her by. Make as many other female aquaintances as possible. The result being is that being girls they will gossip about this dashingly handsome respectful lad called Kodiak who has eyes for only one girl = your girl. Success!! How will she be able to resist? AND it has a double bonus of finding a suitable girl to steal your brothers attention and get him out of the way so you have a clear path to this woman.
I know if I was a girly wurl I'd fall for this trick everytime....! The only exception is if your mum says you aren't allowed, maybe there is a reason, I'd find this out first just in case...
Mr Koda MD